wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
