it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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