We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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