I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
