We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
