he shaved USA in his pubs
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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