But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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