i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
This is my gift to your gina
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
