I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
