I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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