no, he came in my armpit
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
