Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
