STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
