So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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