Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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