your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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