he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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