I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
