Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
