jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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