So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
vagina is talking i cant
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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