she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
operation harelip BJ is a go
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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