i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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