I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
