so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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