You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize