She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Its about making memories worth repressing
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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