She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Found your dick twin last night
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
