i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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