And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
