VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize