what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
