Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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