By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
