We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
