Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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