I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
