you're like a bully in the Christmas story
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
