A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
