Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
