Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
