Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
