Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i barfeds in our rink
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
