ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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