Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
