respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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