I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
The adults are the big ones right?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
