I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize