Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
