brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
